Bob Hope Qoutes

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
[ Funny Old Age Quotes]
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Middle Age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
[ Funny Old Age Quotes]
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I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.
[ Funny Old People Quotes] [ Funny Old Age Quotes]
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I thought 'Deep Throat' was a movie about a giraffe.
[ Funny Movie Quotes]
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I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
[ Funny Religion Quotes]
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I love to go to Washington, if only to be nearer my money.
[ Funny Money Quotes]
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If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
[ Funny Golf Quotes]
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Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned it into a series.
[ Funny Marriage Quotes] [ Funny Divorce Quotes] [ Funny Zsa Zsa Gabor Quotes]
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When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in.
[ Funny Jack Benny Quotes]
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I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance -waiting for the bathroom.
[ Funny Dance Quotes] [ Funny Family Quotes]
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A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
[ Funny Movie Quotes]
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I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.
[ Funny Old People Quotes] [ Funny Old Age Quotes]
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I must say the Senator's victory in Wisconsin was a triumph for democracy. It proves that a millionaire has just as good a chance as anyone else.
[ Funny Political Quotes]
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I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.
[ Funny Acting Quotes]
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If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
[ Funny Patriotic Quotes]
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Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
[ Funny Children Quotes]
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Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.
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My father told me all about the birds and the bees,...